There is a long time term that has been going on between us sisters for years it started with my oldest sister. She used to tell me and my sister Robyne. " Great, I'm the fat sister." Well a few years ago Angie lost a lot of weight and I had worked my butt off to get into shape and Robyne would tell Angie and me "great, now I'm the fat sister. Recently my sister Robyne has lost a bunch of weight which I am ecstatic and so happy for her about but now you guessed it. I'M THE FAT SISTER!
Oh how I hate it! None of us have ever liked being in this situation or none of us have ever liked carrying the "fat sister " title. I have been working so hard with no good results. I have been working out so much for the last 5 months and my body just won't give in. More than anything I am just tired. So tired of waking up early to work out when I am already getting so little sleep. I'm tired of wearing my "fat pants" I'm tired of carrying around this extra 25 pounds that wears me out. It's crazy but 25 pounds does make it harder to do the things you want to do. We really need a new family photo but I don't want any pictures of myself right now. Shallow I know. I just don't get how so many people can pop out one child after another and look exactly the way they did before they got pregnant or be right back in there pre pregnancy clothes 2-3 months after giving birth. I feel so miserable looking the way I do right now but really don't know what more I can do that I'm not already doing.
It is so hard to feel a certain way inside but look so differently on the outside. I wish the outside would reflect the inside. Anyways this is just a vent. I will keep plugging away. It's about a healthy lifestyle not the weight right? Sure I'll keep telling myself that. Maybe someday I will believe it.
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