Adoption, what a blessing

Adoption Day at the Courthouse


Medina's 2004


I can't believe a year has already come and gone since I last posted about how adoption has changed our family's life.

I have said that I didn't think I could raise someone Else's children. But here I am doing it and the best part is that they aren't someone Else's they are mine. I'm not going to lie, it has not always been easy and I spend many days worrying that their birth mom will try to come back in their lives. I also realize that they are getting older and a few years from now they may want to find her on their own.
I guess we will deal with that if the time ever comes.

I am constantly asking myself if I am doing a good enough job. It has been 11 years since Victor and Olivia came into my life and we are all still healing from a lot of the pain that came from Carlos's first marriage. You would hope and pray that time would heal any wounds over night but it just doesn't happen that way. There are some wounds that we all may carry for the rest of our lives.

Now that I have had two children of my own I can't help but feel some pain for their birth Mom. Every Mother's Day my heart breaks for her. I couldn't imagine going so many years without holding my babies. I'm not excusing any of her bad choices. I know that they were hers and hers alone but sometimes I wish she could just see all she has missed out on and see how amazing Victor and Olivia are.

I know I said this many times before but I never could have imagined that this would be part of God's plan for motherhood for me. But I am so glad he included Victor and Olivia in that plan. It has changed me in ways I can't explain. You truly have to go through it to know how it feels. I am grateful everyday that my husband has trusted me to be their Mom. What a blessing! Most of all what a gift!